I’m kinda speechless right now. But at the same time I feel like writing. I guess I just don’t know where to begin. Hmmm…. Let’s see.
My semester’s over and I have 1 and a half months to laze around and do nothing. I don’t know if it’s a good thing but at least it’s better than the late night studying I’ve been doing for the past month. This is a well deserved break.
Next, I’ve been feeling very gloomy the past few days. Maybe it’s because my exams are over and I literally have nothing to look forward to for the next month or so. Honestly, I’m trying to think of productive things to do during my holidays but I just can’t find any. Besides playing tetris of course. I know my mum’s gonna lock me up at home. So I don’t think i’ll be able to do/go out much. Sigh. I think it’s one of the reasons why I’m such a rebel. I need some freedom! ~~ Hahah.
I feel like I have no one to turn or talk to (besides fawwaz) nowadays. I feel left out and lonely especially when he’s out every night and I’m stuck at home. And the fact that I can’t call him while his out cause he’ll snap at me. I hate how he snaps at me whenever he feels like it. It really hurts my feelings. I always have to think of the right words to say or he’ll just snap at me. And that really hurts. Sometimes, I wish he was nicer to me when he’s grumpy. It just hurts my feelings when he screams at me/scolds me/pushes me away. Just because he’s grumpy.. Sigh.
I hate the fact that no one cares. I hate the fact that no one likes me. I hate the fact that I’ve not achieved anything. It hurts, it really does hurt. I wish I could just run away into my own little world like I used to. My own little world……
